Just be patient with me for a second…

OK, I rarely use this forum to rant about things, especially of a personal nature. But I cannot help myself today. As you all know, I dabble in the art of internet dating from time to time. I had taken a break from it over the last few months, but recently have been thinking about getting back into the ring.

Sure, I’ve heard horror stories. And while I have had a few unpleasant experiences myself, I can’t say they outweigh my unpleasant dating experiences with guys I met offline. Dating, in general, can just be unpleasant no matter where you meet someone. So, off to the races we go.

I have tentatively posted a profile back online…new pics, new text, new headers. I thought that might give me some good karma*.

One of my pet peeves is when someone tries to read too deeply into what you have revealed of yourself in your profile. Even worse is when they make absolutely inaccurate observations. Exhibit A:

So you sound like a lot of fun, and seem to have been involved in many adventures and fun events! You have a great smile, it seems to show that awkward, maybe sometimes lonely, but rebelious young woman inside. My guess, most who know you, don’t relly know you! My question would be is that intentional on your part? or do they simply lack the ability to see who is really there?

Buddy- give me a fucking break. Do you really claim to see a lonely yet rebellious young woman inside my smile? Does he really expect me to respond by saying, “Oh Yes! You can SO like totally see inside my soul. People don’t know the REAL me, but I like really want YOU to know me. I beg of you, save me from my lonely and awkward self” Please.

But what happened last night takes the cake. I read a post online. I liked it, it sounded sincere and honest to me**. So I sent a well crafted, witty yet not sarcastic, sincere response of an accurate length (not too wordy, not to brief). He responded immediately. Asked if I wouldn’t mind a quick chat rather than exchanging a million emails. Sure, why not? I was feeling bold.*** We started that horribly awkward chat on the phone. Isn’t it SO strange to talk to someone on the phone that you don’t know at all? So this is how it went:

Jerkface: So, what inspired you to respond to my profile?
Me: Oh, I don’t know. I haven’t ever responded to one before****. I guess just whim and whimsy.
Jerkface: Anything else?
Me: Ummm. I liked how you describe yourself, that you have a sense of humor and are close to your family. You sounded sincere. I think I am the same way.
Jerkface: So, you are looking for someone to take care of you financially? I own a few real estate companies in the city.
Me: What? Well, no. I am pretty independent [he did say he was looking for an independent girl], I am financially stable on my own. I mean, I think generosity is a valuable character trait, but I like to be as giving and generous to the person I am with as they are with me. But I don’t think I need a – (interrupted)
Jerkface: goodnight. *click*

What? Are you kidding me? He hung up on me! I sat there for a second with phone in hand just staring at it. Incredible! I was fired up and immediately called V. who only laughed at me and asked, “what do you expect?”. So, this is what I should expect? Should I lower my expectations to the point where any man who exhibits any base act of kindness and manners is heralded as though he is the King of Redemption? I can’t do that. I don’t think I should either. I guess that means I have to live with the consequences of believing that most people have good intentions [gentleman from exhibit A is excluded]. Call me naive. Call me stupid. Call me unrealistic. But don’t call me cynical, bitter, or resigned… Yet.

*actually, I thought that might attract people who have mistakenly looked me over in my previous attempts.
** a second reading in the light of day has revealed otherwise.
*** Or something.
**** True…for that particular site

Pic of the Day: Nuns on the Prowl

I took this shot while in Rome this past September. Wandering around the back streets somewhere between the Trevi Fountain and the Spanish Steps I came across these two nuns window shopping. I think they were up to no good. They probably would have tried to knock down some convenience store if I hadn’t been there ready with my camera.

I am in LOVE!

All right. It is time to announce to all the world, well at least the blogosphere, that I AM IN LOVE. Granted, my love appears to be unreciprocated. And He doesn’t seem to know my name (yet). Oh, and He is indeed married and living somewhere not here, but I hear that He comes here every so often. Ashlee even saw Him once, at a Swedish Christmas Market of all places.

Yes, you guessed it: Will Ferrell. Not to say that he can quite compare with my long standing crushes on Ben Chaplin, John Cusak (who is starting to look a little leathery to my great disappointment) or Ralph Fiennes... but indeed my dear WF is the adored du jour.

I don’t love all his movies, some are pretty stupid. But any movie is made a lot better for having him in it. If he hadn’t been the lead in Anchorman, the movie would have been just completely unwatchable! And SNL just is not the same since he departed.

(who couldn’t love this man??!)

I was watching SNL: Best of Will Ferrell this weekend and couldn’t stop giggling. The dude who was peeping at me all weekend from the office across the street must of thought I had gone nuts. The sketch where he shows up to a work meeting wearing a USA half t-shirt and a stars and stripes thong is classic. It was one of those sketches where the other actors can’t help but crack up as well– which in my book makes it all the funnier watching them trying to keep a straight face. Sadly I couldn’t find photographic evidence of this hilarity.

Following in the footsteps of comedic actors gone serious, Robin Williams and Jim Carey, Will is about to try his hand at a serious role* playing a wandering loner in Winter Passing (staring older hottie Ed Harris as well).

*That is if you don’t consider his turn in the recent Woody Allen Flick Melinda and Melinda as a serious role

I am…

According to Google: “Terra Is”… *

Terra is the Latin name for the Earth
Terra is something of an institution in Napa Valley
Terra is a boy-meets-girl labor of love
Terra is finally seeing the light of day
Terra is a gem on many levels
Terra is dead
Terra is not dead
Terra is right too.
Terra is a great find
Terra is a love story
Terra is earthy in colour
Terra is a middle-aged Cuban immigrant
Terra is confused
Terra is a dismal date for Cadet Happy
Terra is unhappy on her sixteenth birthday
Terra is the ultimate defensive driver
Terra is a fine choice for climbers, skiers, and off-trail travelers
Terra is still a little bit of a bit of a puzzle
Terra is trying to get on with her life
Terra is sure to make one feel grounded
Terra is becoming the focus of the arsonist
Terra is a reminder of the human need for intimacy
Terra is pretty cheap
Terra is a must.
Terra is a unique individual
Terra is 2 years behind schedule
Terra is perfectly capable of being on her own
Terra is out of the question
Terra is going on a detoxification program
Terra is a backstabber
Terra is a whippersnapper
Terra is a very special friend and helper
Terra is a joke
Terra is living everyone’s nightmare
Terra is #1 on German radio station
Terra is not alone

*Clearly a slow day for blogging. Apologies to all.

Peace Out

How many of you have heard of the Department of Peace?

A bill to create a U.S. Department of Peace (H.R. 1673) is gaining momentum in the House of Representatives. This bill establishes non-violence as an organizing principle of American society and would provide the U.S. President with an array of peace-building policy options for domestic and international use.

The Department would focus on non-military peaceful conflict resolutions, seek to prevent violence, and promote democratic principles to expand human rights.

Domestically, the Department would be responsible for developing policies which address issues such as domestic violence, child abuse, mistreatment of the elderly, and other issues of cultural violence.

Internationally, the Department would gather research, analyze foreign policy and make recommendations to the President on how to address the root causes of war, ideally so that intervention could take place before violence begins. The Department would also endeavor to improve national security, including the protection of human rights.

In summary, the Department would:

    • Address matters both domestic and international in scope;
    • Endeavor to promote justice and democratic principles to expand human rights;
    • Strengthen non-military means of peacemaking;
    • Work to create peace, prevent violence, divert from armed conflict, use field-tested programs, and develop new structures in non-violent intervention, mediation, peaceful resolution;
    • Encourage the development of initiatives from local communities, religious groups, and nongovernmental organizations.

For much more information on what it would do, read the bill here.

Currently the bill needs a sponsor in the Senate, and Senator Barbara Boxer is reported to be interested. Senator Boxer’s aides stressed the importance of hearing from citizens regarding how they feel about this legislation. They are urging you to call, email and fax Senator Boxer (as well as your own senators). Whether you are a resident of California or not, the Senator would like to hear from you. Contact details can be found on the website.

I don’t know how successful this department could be, but I think it would be interesting to bring the conversation to the national forefront.

Pic of the day: Naked on Rollerskates

Ever wish you could find a poster of that kitchy vintage pulp paperback cover from that book hidden way back on your mom’s shelf? Well, this is the place for you: The Pod Gallery.

In their own words:

PODpublishing is a New York City based publisher of fine art prints.We offer thousands of images for sale using our own web-basedPrint On Demand system,which we also make available to artists,galleries and institutions.

By chance have you been searching high and low for that 44 x 55” Canvas Giclee Print of Reform School Girl by Felice Swados? Here you go!

Also available in convenient notecard sizes! Choose from the Kinky Set, theQueer Set, the Hippie Set, the Drugs set, Cheescaket set 1, Cheescake set 2.

Now you know what to give your Mom for Mother’s Day!

Posted in WTF